Labeling is a such a dangerous trend that is happening more and more these days. We all have seen disturbing examples of this very recently; calling someone ‘Crooked’, ‘Stupid’, ‘Fake’ or worse. Kind of sounds like name calling – doesn’t it? Kind of sounds like bullying? It allows someone to put another person into a neat little box with a neat little label on it, and then it’s just simple to tie a little bow on it and walk away. While this may be easy to do, I don’t really think that anyone can fit into a little box. I think we are so much more complex than that. I think we are better than that little box. And I think it is a lazy way of dealing with complicated issues. I think it is hurtful, harmful, dangerous and disrespectful to label another human being. Labeling can also be a form of discrimination. It assigns a category, a stereotype, a classification to someone, and while that label is attached to a person or group of people there is no need or desire to delve deeper, to get to know that person, or to try to understand an individual. The damage is done in the label. I think that labeling is better left to cans and packages of food.
My Friends and My Sparkles
I have been blessed to have some very cool, close friends in my life. I can not downplay the importance of these friends. These friends are family; some related by love, some related by blood. And my life is forever enriched by my circle of friends. I am fortunate to be able to add friends and expand my circle. I chose to be inclusive rather than exclusive – and so my circle grows. I am LUCKY. My friends love me, renew me, understand me, touch me. We can laugh, cry, and rejoice together. We have each other’s back. We save seats for each other. We commiserate together. We watch the stars together. We learn about space weather together. We bike together. We travel together. Some of us even play Bridge together. We do all sorts of fun fabulous things together, or not – sometimes we might just want to hang out together.
My friends have taught me so many things;
and I am stronger because of them and I continue to learn from them. I treasure my friendships, and I trust these beautiful people with my imperfect self.
Of all my wonderful friends, I have 3 friends in a very special category. They are my Sparkles . They are my heart and soul. They find me; they save me; they are totally there for me – as I am for them. I trust them with my everything and every beat of my heart. They are warmth, love, peace, life. We relish, we comfort , we grow together. I can not imagine my life without them. And I’m proud to say we have NO need for FILTERS. We know the core and foundation of each other, and there is absolutely nothing that could ever be said to change this.
Although…. one of my Sparkles did once throw a lamp at me – you know who you are – but I’m certain that I did deserve this. 
My Sparkles — forever in my life:
I also have Family Sparkles . I have my daughter, my husband, and my first friend ever – my sister. These Sparkles also renew me, and love me and stand by me. And as family, we have a very special bond that transcends all space and time.
And sometimes they know me better than I even know myself!
First post – friendship blog
. 
Some things about friendship I discovered this past year, and some thoughts.
Always take the high road.
FIRST – what a friend IS.
True friends love and respect you.
Friends root for you.
Friends replenish you.
Friendship is loving.
Friendship is enduring.
Friends make you feel good about being around them.
Friends make you proud, as you in turn make your friends proud.
Friendship is sacred.
SECOND – what a friend is NOT
Friendship is never about making another person feel bad about themselves, it is not about poisoning you or others.
Friends do not try to hurt you more than they love you.
Friends don’t try to stunt your growth rather than clap for it.
Friends don’t name call, friends are not mean – and meanness is apparent – especially as we age, a face can turn very hard, ugly, and wrinkled from storing all that bitterness and hatred.
Friends don’t bring you stress rather than peace.
Friends don’t gossip about you. A RED Flag….when you hear someone talk smack about her other friends. Don’t think for a moment that you are immune to this. She will trash you at some point. Friends just don’t talk shit about their friends.
Trying to make sense of a hurtful friendship. Some Lessons learned
I started this blog in 2018, as a way to make sense of a very painful and nasty encounter with a woman once considered to be a friend of mine. She was not.
In blogging about friendship,
I am learning about truth and honesty, how to be a good friend and how to treat all sorts of people that I interact with, and treating people with dignity. I’m learning about what and who is really important in my life. I can’t be friends with everybody…nor do I want to – but everyone has a story and a truth, some truths just might not gel very well with mine.
And the beauty is,
I am freeing myself and allowing new growth and looking at new experiences with an open heart. Yes – I’m sure I will be hurt again. But I am really happy with myself for overcoming an ugly situation and person and trusting my instincts. And, I consider it a win turning this very hurtful experience into a positive one. A saying that I think about is; hurt me once – shame on you, hurt me twice – shame on me. An amazing thing happening to me from writing this blog is learning about the things that really matter to me, welcoming in a softness, a calmness, a wisdom; and trying to replace the hardness and anxieties of life.
Never talk trash about another . As painful as it may be , and no matter how low someone else goes (and it might get very low), take the high road. In the end it is you and you alone that you are accountable to.
Not sure where I read this, but – it certainly holds true: Never say mean words out of anger. Your anger will pass. But your mean words can scar a person for life. So use kind words or be silent. One thing I know for sure: BE KIND.
Be a true friend.